I have been in a whirlpool of not knowing what I should be doing and am thankfully feeling like I am on an exit path from the swirling. I don't like feeling any form of mental instability and the extreme high and then low knocked me around... It scared me for a bit, reminding me of the past as normal lows in life don't make me feel that way anymore, but this was different. But today is a new day, I feel stronger today than I have in a while and have the most energy I have had in several weeks.
Michael is feeling better as well, which I know is in part because he sees me doing better. I really wanted to not forget about his pain, which sometimes was difficult in my own darkness, but it was definitely worth fighting against. I love that man.
I am getting my nutrition back on track after my "F-it" approach the past couple weeks, and am back to reducing grains, sugar, artificial sweetener, overly processed foods and white flours. I swear the artificial sweetener is the hardest for me to give up! I was raised on sweet n low and anything "diet" so I am quite accustomed to asperatame and was quite sad when I started to learn more about the potentially harmful chemical. Regardless of long term effects, there has been research that shows it may spike insulin more than regular sugar, therefor being even worse than consuming a regularly sugared syrupy drink. Eek!
Yesterday I started adding Apple Cider Vinegar pills to my routine as it MAY assist in weight loss and lowering insulin, so we shall see. There is an incredible amount of supplements and drinks out there supposedly meant to cure everything from cancer to warts, and I occasionally get sucked in, but usually remain pretty skeptical. This one however caught my eye after being discussed in a PCOS group and there is a lot of information online from people who swear it works..so, what the hell?
On the fertility front, I was given the go ahead to start trying to conceive whenever I was able, with the doctor saying she sees women being most fertile after a miscarriage, maybe something to do with our bodies liking being pregnant. I am wearing the monitor again, and am possibly about to ovulate according to temps. Or it wont happen naturally, and I will take Femara again next cycle.
Whichever happens, we are hopeful <3
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